The Free Spirit of Moon

8:02pm: Market
Moon walked the streets after leaving the Mall. She hadn't been outside like this since she arrived into the city. She felt better getting some fresh air. She didn't know where she was going. Just walking. It was the best for her right now. She looked around her. It was strange. Buildings. All closed in tightly. How did people live here? Didn't they feel the need to be out? And not just outside. But away from the concrete that surrounded them. But in another way it was interesting. And she wondered how life was before the Virus here. She could imagine the chaos once it hit though. It must have been awful. It was so different to her. Maybe she liked it? She wasn't sure. But she had decided to give the Mall another chance. Give herself another chance. And then if things didn't work out...well...she wasn't sure. When that time came she would decide.

She found herself in the Market. This seemed busier than the Mall and she felt herself drawing herself inwards as she walked by the stalls. Trading? Buying? So much like her life before. She wasn't very good at that. Never was given the chance really. But that was okay. She looked down at the belt still in her hand. She wanted to get rid of it. She knew that the minute she left the Mall. Maybe someone would want it? Trade it for a few things? That might work. She had never owned much so this might be strange. She approached one of the stalls.

4:03pm: Not knowing
Moon had raced down the stairs after the incident in the cafe. She wasn't even sure why it bothered her so much. She slowed her pace. To leave? She shook her head. She didn't even know any more. She had tried so hard the past week to fit in. And then maybe tried a little too hard. Decided to just let it be. And now...she just couldn't think. To waste food like that. To argue over something petty. She just couldn't understand. She felt out of place. As if there was no where to belong. She needed to get out. She knew that. But would she leave? Just like that? She didn't know. She didn't know anything any more. Why was she doing this to herself? What more did she need to prove to herself?

She sat down by the Phoenix statue, wrapping her arms around herself. It wasn't that she had spent the time to make the food. It didn't matter to her who did. It was just the utter waste. She couldn't imagine it. When you were out to survive you just couldn't do that. And just without thought. She knew what they were argueing about. It was rather obvious. And stupid. What did they think they were proving? But she didn't know all the details. Who was she to give her opinion? She just knew she didn't fit in. She could try. Over and over she could. But she kept thinking the same answer. This would never be. She was just passing through. There was no doubt in her mind.

9:09am: Location - Moon's Room
After leaving the kitchen Moon made it back to her room. She flung herself on the bed. She wasn't going to cry. It was something else she had taught herself not to do. Crying was a weakness. Something others could use against you. Told them they had control over you. She wasn't going to let that happen. Never again. She had come here for some freedom. To be herself. But she had yet to discover who she was. On her own. Do you ever smile? She heard the words of some girl in a Tribe she had stayed with for a short while. When there was a reason to smile...which there hadn't been. Not for a long time...

4:37pm: Morning - Moon's Room
Moon woke up to the sound of voices. Had she overslept? She normally could wake up before anyone else. But it had been a long night. Sleepless. Full of doubts. She sat up still trying to get used to the fact that she was at the Mall. In a room that had been redecorated for her. It was still rather dull. She just didn't own that much and the objects that were at the Mall just didn't suit her taste. She would have to change a few things. Now if that didn't sound like a spoiled person. She should be happy she had a place to stay. Not worry about what it looked like.

She got up and pulled her boots on. Better start the day. Hopefully she had something to do today instead of a day off like yesterday. That was more than she could take. She just didn't know what to do around here. She was always busy before. Chores to do. Traveling. Here it was just...she didn't know. It was just there. She pulled a comb through her hair. Readjusted the beads and left it at that. She touched up her makeup which was simple. Dark eyeliner. White streaks across her forhead. A darker shade of lipstick.

Now to face people. She took a deep breath and pushed the gauzy curtain they had hung up in the doorway to replace the beads that were there before. She could see a few people in the main cafe and just couldn't go any farther. She continued to feel unsure and doubts and just couldn't force herself to move...

10:14pm: [OOC - Week Skip]
( Before it's too late...Moon's Week )

11:10am: Back to sleep - Location - Pride's Old Room
Moon returned to the room she had spent the day sleeping in. Alteast seven hours she had figured out. And if the owner hand't claimed it then she decided it had to be one of the empty ones. That was fine. No unvited guests. No one saying she was taking what was theirs. Seven hours she had slept...She couldn't believe it in one way. Yet in another she knew it was exactly what she needed. It was why even now she returned to sleep instead of staying to talk to anyone. She had passed out. Her body had shut down when she forgot to take care of it. Well, she didn't plan to do that again. Couldn't do that again. And that was also the reason she had forced herself to get out of bed to eat dinner. Sleep was just part of it. And dinner wasn't bad at all. Perhaps a little too silent. Perhaps a little too tense. But when you slept through the day you obviously missed things. Not that it was her business...

She took a deep breath as she sat down on the bed removing her boots. She probably should have gone downstairs to the hospital to sleep. She still didn't know her place here and to take a room like an invited guests seemed wrong. Strange. But she doubted her legs could handle the stairs. She didn't intend to spend time in the hospital because she had fallen down them. She swung her legs up, resting back. She willed herself to sleep, but found herself staring at the ceiling. Thinking. Everyone had a reason to be somewhere. What was her reason for being here? Five minutes passed. Then ten. She couldn't find one. The reason for her coming here was no more. What do you do after that?

I had dreams once, too... Once. The Virus had killed them. And she had never allowed herself to create any new ones. How do you go forward when there was nothing to go forward to? Why had she stayed so long with the Horse Traders? It was a place to be. Simple. But she wanted someplace more than that. A place to belong. A place for dreams. A place for hopes. But did such a place exist any more? Would she let it exist?

She closed her eyes one thought still bothering her. You don't happen to know a Joe? Of the Horse Trader Tribe? Salene had asked yesterday. How had she known? Had she met the Traders? If so then Joe had to be asking about her. Searching perhaps? She rolled over on her side now nervous. She hoped not. But if he was she wouldn't stay here. Joe wasn't dumb. He knew to ask Salene - a Mall Rat - if she had seen Moon. This meant he had already figured out where Moon had decided to go. She didn't like that thought. But would he really waste his time coming to look for her? She hid her face in the pillow. Hoping for sleep over these thoughts...

11:00pm: Waking up...
Moon stirred, turning over. There was this sound. Like a pot being banged on. It wasn't even musical. Just noise. Apparently that was what woke her up. Atleast she believed so. When had she fallen asleep? She vaguely remembered Ryan telling her she had passed out in the hallway. That was dumb of her. Dumb and stupid. How did she expect to earn her stay if she did that?

She opened her eyes and wish she hadn't. This room she had been put into was...she couldn't describe it, but it wasn't exactly the best thing to see when you first woke up. She sat up feeling better with the sleep she had had. But how long had she slept? There was no way of telling time. No windows available at the moment. She hoped it wasn't too long. And with the extra sleep now in her she knew she would be getting hungry. Wonderful... She thought. First steal someone's bed and then eat their food. She took a deep breath. She didn't want to think yet, but she would have to soon find a reason for her staying her. Everyone had a reason.

She tried to make sense of the mess her hair had become still hearing the sound. For a quick second at the beginning she had thought maybe that was how they called Tribal Meetings. Or announced big events. But the noise continued and she doubted that was it. And she hoped it would stop soon! She covered her ears for a moment and closed her eyes for a brief second. What a way to wake up.

11:31am: Location - Upper Hallway of Mall
Moon had hoped the mostly quiet morning and the hot shower would make her feel better. Get rid of a nagging feeling that had plagued her for several hours at this point. But she was beginning to have trouble focusing her thoughts. She paused for a moment and blinked, pushing the feeling back. She straightened up. It had helped. A little. She knew basically what was wrong. She hadn't slept last night and had been travelling with little rest days earlier to reach the city. And she couldn't remember when she last ate something. Let alone ate anything that would be considered a meal. It was stupid. And she knew it.

But there was no way to change it now. She would have to try to focus. Then when she had a chance eat and rest. And maybe find time to just relax. Her emotions were in a bundle. Instead of facing the thoughts and feelings within her she had ignored them. Pushed them away. Hid from them. And she had to admit that. She also had to admit she wasn't very good at "fitting in". Everything had been simpler before.

She had followed her morning companions into the Mall proper. Mouse had run into the cafe. Probably to show off her new look. May had headed the same direction. It was most likely where Moon would go as well. Or maybe it was best to find one of those rooms Salene had talked about last night. Get some rest first. Or atleast piece through her thoughts. She would have to face herself again. Face the facts why she had left the Horse Traders. If she didn't she would start thinking it was wrong of her. A mistake. Atleast there she knew her place. What was expected of her. She slowed her pace. A wave of dizziness washed over her. She grabbed the railing feeling sick. Kneeling down she rested her head against the bars. She knew she was stronger than this. She had gone hungry before. She had been tired to the point of exhaustion and beyond. And she knew why she left the Traders. HAD to leave. She pulled herself back up. Forcing herself to walk farther. She needed to find that room to rest in.

She felt stupid. If she hadn't let these thoughts eat at her she would be able to fight against the exhaustion and hunger. But she had. She had let everything get to her. Worry about little details that weren't worth thinking about. She had the strength she thought she lacked or she wouldn't have made it this far. And it had been far. Months of traveling. Keeping herself one step ahead.

She made it down the one side of the upstairs. She briefly noticed that a part of the bannister was missing and caution tape had been stretched across the opening. Strange. Another wave of dizziness over took her and she couldn't focus her vision. Everything was blurring. She felt herself begin to fall. She reached out but couldn't even find a wall to balance against. She didn't even feel the floor as she collapsed unconscious.

3:02pm: A New Day - Location - Hospital
Moon had tried to fall asleep. Twice. Maybe three times. Failing each time. Maybe she was thinking too much. Maybe it was her surroundings. Strange coldness. Stranger silence. Reading the book failed as well. Words just jumbled together.

And then the Mall exploded with noise. Moon jumped up from the chair in shock as the walls seemed to vibrate with the music. It had been years since she had heard music and actually never at that volume. She went to the entrance of the hospital in time to for the music to be turned off. She heard Salene scold the children and then footsteps going back upstairs.

No one else was up? She wondered, returning to the hospital to put away the blankets she had brought out and reshelved the book. She was used to things getting done. You woke up and had something to do. No questions. But the Mallrats did have that party last night. Some probably had hangovers. Lovely start to a day.

Strangely she didn't feel tired nor exactly hungry. And she had to make plans for the day. She needed to know what she was going to do...

10:05pm: The Hospital
Moon slipped from the room back into the hospital carrying the supplies the guard had brought her. She emptied the bowl and cleaned the cloths the best she could finding a place to hang them. She had to keep herself occupied. Her thoughts were running rampant.

She gathered some blankets she found and took them to one of the hospital beds, but couldn't convince herself to even think about sleep. She tried sitting in one of the chairs again, but it didn't help.

She knew she needed her rest if she planned to leave tomorrow and continue to travel, but she couldn't sit still. Bray didn't trust her. Simple fact. That was fine. But something had happened to the occupants of this Mall. More than what had happened to some people in the city. And it didn't seem as if anyone was talking.

She got up again and paced. It was all so different. Felt strange. And she wasn't sure if she was comfortable. Maybe that's why she couldn't sleep. She found a book that seemed to explain some of what was in this room. She flipped through it. Not really concentrating on the words. It was just something to do for the rest of the night until morning came.

9:17pm: Moon's Thoughts then to the Cage Room
Moon had left the party. No regrets. No wishes. The Mallrats deserved their chance at some happiness. She entered the hospital. They had done an amazing job gathering the supplies. She didn't know what some of it was, but figured it had some importance. She moved to a far corner away from the noise. Her mind filled with thoughts. Emotions. She sat in a chair and curled up. Maybe tomorrow before she left she could find someplace to clean up. Maybe wash her clothes. She should have done that earlier so they had all night to dry. Although she had nothing to temporarily wear. Oh well. It didn't matter. She would be traveling once again and they would get dusty and travel worn. She fiddled with the tassles on her skirt. The sound of the music still reaching her ears. It had been years since she had heard music like that. It amazed her how the Mallrats lived. Even some of the other Tribes she had spent some time with didn't have half of what they did.

She hugged her knees to her chest. Where was she going to go? Where would she be welcomed? Her. Lost. A stranger. Not knowing where she belonged. Not knowing any more who she was. Two months Joe had given her. Accept me or leave. She couldn't stay. She had to escape. To find...what? Herself? And what ahd she discovered? What had she told Dax? She was a free spirit. Going where she pleased. Doing what she pleased. That's what she had wanted all along, wasn't it?

She shifted in her chair. Wide awake. Unable to sleep. She still had too many questions. And she needed to talk to Bray. She wouldn't be able to sleep unless she did. It was a bad idea she knew. Something was wrong with him. He was ill somehow. And this time she didn't think she could help him.

She stood up and slipped out of the hospital, past the guard without a word and into the room with the cage. Bray was asleep. Or appeared to be. She walked up to the cage. The tray of food was untouched. Stubborn...She pulled it from the cage, putting it aside, then took a place near him, grasping the bars. He barely looked like Bray. Even resting there like that. She shouldn't have come back here. She wished there was something she could do for him. "Bray..." She said softly, shaking her head.

10:37pm: Location - Out in the carpark
Moon felt like leaving the Mall. Atleast to get some fresh air. She wasn't dumb enough to leave now. While darkness was settling over the city. Not while she was in unfamiliar territory. And she found she couldn't go down the stairs while another large group had gathered there. But she had found an exit down the hall and going through there found that it led to a parking builiding. Good enough as it was open.

She went over to one of the half walls and leaned over, looking down at the ground. Then pushed back to look out into the city. What had she gotten herself into? Coming for a visit like this and then getting caught up in the going ons of the Mallrats. And they were a talkative bunch. Nosy too. Admittingly the Horse Traders pried when they thought it was necessary. But she just felt it was different. Maybe it wasn't.

She took a deep breath. The sounds of the Mall could still be heard from out here. Not very clearly which was all good. Quiet was better for awhile.

9:35pm: Into the City
Moon had been traveling for awhile. Going nowhere. Being no one. But the time for that to change had come. And she knew where she would go. Where she HAD to go. The City. She had thought about it for months, but had avoided it. To enter there and have her world shattered...

Not even a note - Joe had told her. Not a word. Not a note. That wasn't like Bray. She was positive he would have said something, but no matter what she couldn't get Joe to tell her. It had taken awhile for her to gain the strength she had told Bray she didn't have. To move on. Away from Joe. Away from the Traders...

But now it was time to enter the City. She had never been there. Even Pre-Virus she had never entered. It was a world away from the fields, the horses, the wilderness. It was like a stranger to her and she imagined she looked the stranger to it. She had never changed the way she looked. The way she dressed. It was what had kept her identity through the months. She was dressed in silver, soft greys, and white. Her long, dark hair was curled, decorated with beads, twisted and left down to frame her exotic features. A white stretch net shirt with long sleeves was layerd under a grey silver cami top decorated with delicate silver chains. the skirt was soft grey, tassled at the bottom. A large belt encircled her waist and slightly worn travelling boots were upon her feet. Her jewelry was appropriate for the Horse Trader she once was. Her dark eyes were outlined in black and simple white lines across her forhead were what was left of her Tribal markings.

But while she felt comfortable out in the free open spaces she became unsure within the confines of the building lined streets. People looked. People stared. People avoided. But she kept her head up and continued her journey.

A few times she had asked someone - Where was the Mall? Where were the Mallrats located? - and they would point. Or give random directions that made no sense to her. But she thanked them none-the-less. Traveling Eco she had been called once or twice and she just smiled. She was no Eco. And no longer a Horse Trader. They would never let her back in. No matter how much Joe wanted her. Unless she gave herself to him which she would never do. She shivered. The deepest shadows of the woods could not match the coldness that she felt here within an articial world.